It's 1:30 a.m. and I am literally stuck in a rut ... or a few ruts, rather.
I've been contemplating getting rid of a number of people on my Facebook. People I don't talk to anymore. People I never got along with in the first place. People who made my life miserable in one way or another. People that I need to let go of.
But what's the real reason for getting rid of them? Is it to complete closure? To fully close the wounds? To finally prove that when I say "I'm over this" I mean it? Or is it just for the selfish reason that I cannot handle even a tiny piece of the past coming back to haunt me?
I battled with depression once, it seems like lifetimes ago now, but every so often, one little remnant of the past affects me like nothing else. So is it actually selfish to want to get rid of as many of those bad memories as I can?
After my depression I realized that I need to prioritize myself. I'm not useless, spineless, or worth nothing. I'm worth a lot. I matter. I need to do things for me.
I suppose I have my answer then ... I need to buck up and truly move on from my past. I can't merely forget about the past, it's not that easy, but I can definitely look beyond it. I can't keep dragging myself down with the little things that were. I need to focus on now and the future.
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